I count myself one of the most blessed of men on the face of the earth. Why? Because I have a wife who loves me in spite of all my mistakes, stubbornness, pride, arrogance, and general selfishness. Okay, before you start thinking I am this horrible person, let me just say that I really am a nice guy, but I do recognize that I have flaws…many, many flaws. Yet my wife, in spite of her own flaws, loves me and remains committed to me. Despite our arguments and mistakes, we remain committed to one another and love each other; yet it wasn’t always so.
Our first year of marriage was plagued by many angry words and a severe lack of true communication. We struggled and we both made mistakes, and I take responsibility for most of them. Yet, by the grace of God, we persevered. We saw a counselor and read some books, and we began to realize that our understanding of love was very shallow. The best definition of love can be found in the Holy Bible, 1 Corinthians 13:4-8a:
4 Love is patient, love is kind and is not jealous; love does not brag and is not arrogant, 5 does not act unbecomingly; it does not seek its own, is not provoked, does not take into account a wrong suffered, 6 does not rejoice in unrighteousness, but rejoices with the truth; 7 bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. 8 Love never fails;
Hollywood and television overwhelmingly portrays love as either intense infatuation or blatant lust, neither of which fits the biblical definition. Infatuation eventually fades and lust is entirely selfish, which probably explains why so many marriages that are based on them fail. When your love for another person fits this definition, it becomes clearer that marriage is really about love and commitment. So many people go into marriage concentrating on what they want out of it, yet if you truly love someone your focus will shift from yourself to the other person. As my wife and I just recently celebrated our anniversary, I reflect on how my words and actions demonstrate my love for her over the past year and how I can better show my love for the most wonderful wife in the world. Thank you sweetheart for marrying me and for loving me in spite my flaws and mistakes. I love you.